I have been in New Zealand for nearly 9 years but I cannot lose my roots in South African violence. Violence is here in New Zealand,
New Plymouth also. Violence and aggression are everywhere.
To deal with this violence in 1996 I spent most of the year in Tara, the mental health hospital in Johannesburg, South Africa.
I had many ECT treatments which didn't help the depression but damaged myh ability to concentrate and remember everyday things. Acts of violence were
unfortunately not forgotten but reinforced.
To deal with these everyday things I believed I was a dog and did many dangerous things, including playing in the traffic with my own two very special dogs. When I came to
New Zealand I could not bring my dogs with me and I had both of them put down - a decision that still haunts me. |